Saying Goodbye

We left Phnom Penh, Cambodia this morning and are in Bangkok for the night...leaving to go home early tomorrow morning. I have so many things that I am processing. But to give you some insight in where my heart is at, here is my entry in my prayer journal I wrote this morning:

"Father God, I sit here in the Phnom Penh airport, listening to worship music on my ipod. I hear the song by Jeremy Camp that says "Give me Jesus. You can have all this world, but give me Jesus." And, Lord, after being here tears will not stop coming...my heart resonates with that song so much right now. There is just so much darkness, sin, and depravity in this world...and You, Jesus, are the one and only True Light in the midst of the darkness. I can only imagine how much Your heart must be grieved and saddened by the sins from the previous generation filtering down and influencing this culture- consuming it with sin and the worship of immorality. The consequences have truly left their mark and scars on the young girls who live here. They are the ones paying the biggest cost, and feeling those consequences so greatly. Each day hundreds of young girls are losing their innocence. But, Lord, my only hope in it all is that You have a heart of love towards those girls. I think of Luke 15, the parable of the lost sheep. Thank you, Lord, that You are a God who, although there is a whole culture of lost sheep here, are willing to leave the 99 and go and rescue the 1. Looking into the eyes of the girls of Remember Nhu, and holding and hugging them, gives me hope. You have gone after them...one by one. And there is rejoicing in heaven for it! That is my only consolation in this experience...each one of those girls You love deeply. And You have found them and carried them on Your shoulders, back to safety. Thank you for Carl and Laurie...that they are Your hands, feet, and shoulders here, in such a dark place. Give them endurance to do Your work in this dark place. Give them an extra measure of Your grace, strength, and love to persevere. Give them hearts that are filled with Your love to go after the "one sheep" again and again. And we will rejoice, with heaven, as each girl is brought to safety and loved to Jesus Himself. I pray each girl will come to know You and love you deeply and sweetly. I pray that, starting in them, Your light will shine so brightly in this darkness, that Your glory will start illuminating this place- one person, one sheep, at a time. I PRAISE YOU, LORD! Thank you for Your goodness and Your love and Your grace! Give me, and all of those at Remember Nhu, more of Jesus. I don't want this world...I just want more of You. I pray this in the Loving and Saving Name of Jesus. Amen."

Again, thank you for your prayers! I am on antibiotics and feeling better. However, Barbara has started feeling sick. So please pray for her health. Also, please pray for safety in our flights tomorrow. And know that more will be posted, following our return, as God continues to teach us when we are back. Much love to you...

More Lessons, More Thoughts...

This last week is very difficult to put into words. I don't think that either Barbara or I have really been able to fully grasp, or process, what we have seen and experienced. Sure, there were definite cultural differences we had experienced in Thailand...and maybe even experienced a little culture shock there, to some degree. But what we saw there was nothing compared to the extreme poverty and oppression we have witnessed, here in Cambodia.

We are going to get on that plane, later in the week, different people from what we have seen and what we have experienced. My guess is that a lot of these things we won't even be able to process completely until we have been home for some time.

For instance, yesterday we went to visit and hand out fruit to the kids who live along the river villages. These people wash, eat, and use the same water as their restroom. They live off of about $25 a month. Barbara and I concluded that there was nothing desirable to go there, other than the call to do God's work. The smell and sight of the filth and garbage cannot be captured in a mere photo. The kids flocked around us, as we handed out oranges and apples. These precious kids have so many dangers. First, and obviously, the physical risks of sickness and disease and starvation. There are also open electric lines all over the place, that if they were to be accidently touch, they would lose fingers, or even their lives since they are fully surrounded by water. Their homes are often house boats. Secondly, there is the definite risk of being sold into the sex trade. We only saw super young kids (younger than about 8 years old) and older kids (about 15 or so) because all of the other kids had probably been sold by their families, to earn money to supply themselves the bare necessities.

When we drove back to the city, Laurie asked us what our response was. I couldn't formulate any words (just as, even now, I am struggling to describe). I simply told her that, after we gave fruit to one of the girls, she later was dancing seductively on the porch, infront of men, to the song "Bringing Sexy Back." My guess is she was about 8. We got out the pictures and showed Laurie which girl it was. Remember Nhu may be doing research to see if they can help this girl.

But the thing that has been most difficult for me to process in my mind and heart is where I fit in all of this. And, even more, how to grasp the depravity of sin and man. I have been able to go back to a hotel every night...which, to be honest, has even been a struggle for Barbara and I with the level of cleanliness from what we are used to. But these kids can never leave it. And, in fact, they don't even think about leaving because they are fully unable to grasp the concept of tomorrow, or even having a future. Their minds only process the moment and that specific day.

Barbara and I have been struck with the fact that we are now responsible with what we have seen and experienced with our own eyes.

However, there have been such beautiful moments as well. Barbara has fallen completely in love! I think, if it were even possible, she would surprise Steve at the airport with a carload of them!! I feel the exact same way. These girls are so incredibly special...They are so full of love and express it so openly. To know where these girls have come from (many come from the villages by the river) and to see how they have blossomed is simpliy amazing. The other day they broke out in a song, that they sang in English. They sang "I love you Lord, and I lift my voice, to worship You, oh my soul rejoice. Take joy my King, in what you hear. May it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear." I know it was a sweet sound in their Savior's ear, the One who has lovingly and tenderly rescued these girls and restoring their beautiful lives. It made me think of Psalm 40:1-3 Ï waited patiently for the LORD; And He inclined to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay...He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God"" God has been so good to them. And seeing this has given Barbara and I hope, in the midst of what we have seen.

Today plans have changed a little bit. I have found myself sick...please pray for me. The main concern is that my sore throat (which is pretty bad, to be honest) will go to my ears. With 25 or 30 hours of travel coming up later this week, it would not be good to get an ear infection while flying. We may try to get some perscriptions later this week...but that can be a little tricky since I am not home with my doctor and medical attention is limited here. It should be fine, but I truly appreciate prayer. Being sick this morning has given me time to stay in and read and journal. Barbara is out at the Killing Fields, where about 25 years ago, 90% of the church in Cambodia was killed...so pray for her as she is taking in more devestation.

Wow...so much more to say...but for a later time, I guess! :) Barbara and I thank you so, so much for your prayers. Please continue to pray as the trip is coming to a close here soon. God has met us here...and we are thankful. Our God is so good.

Pictures from Phnom Penh

I just wanted to upload some pictures from our trip so far to Cambodia. There isn't any time to write, and internet service is poor. So, hopefully, I will be able to write later tonight to share with you what we have been learning, experiencing, and seeing. I hope that you can see our fun times with the kiddos, adventures with Nhu at the salon, and the saddening poverty from the picture taken from our hotel room. Love you all...will write again soon!

Another Day of Learning & Loving

I am going to make an attempt at writing a new entry, hoping that I do not get kicked off of the internet again. These internet cafes in Cambodia are slightly different from the United States, as are many things. :)

Barbara and I are feeling the prayers of many of you back home. So, first, THANK YOU VERY MUCH for praying and emailing us. Your words have been uplifting and encouraged us so much!

We were able to go to the salon for the first time yesterday...and it was so much fun!! I was able to work with Nhu, as Barbara enjoyed getting a foot massage, manicure, and pedicure. These girls are very talented and are doing a great job with what they have accessable to them...Nhu has done a great job training them to this point. But please pray for her. She is feeling sick and it makes training her more difficult. But what a delightful girl she is! We have hit it off instantly...but she is so easy to love that it took no effort what-so-ever. :) The main hang-up we are facing is that these girls do not have much available for them to use...everything from products they use, sell, color hair with, and hot tools (like curling and flat irons). They are using things you would buy at a drug store in the States. And for those hairstylists reading this, they only use 40 volume developer for everything. (Yikes!) Please pray for Nhu, Carl, and I as we come up with a "game plan" to how best help them...both now when I am here, and also as I go back to the States to collect supplies, further training, etc.

After we left the salon we were able to go visit the girls in the apartment. These girls are so FULL of love!! I didn't think it was possible to hold that many little hands at one time! There were times, as we took a walk to dinner, that Barbara and I had about six girls each, holding our hands. We are continuing to learn from these children. We wish we could just know each of their stories deeply...they are profoundly heartbreaking. We find it such a blessing and privilege to hold these girls and love their little broken hearts. The Lord is really restoring them...their faces express so much joy and their smiles radiate Jesus!

This morning I read Acts 17. This was helpful for me in processing what we saw at the National Museum this morning. I read about how Paul was in Athens, and observed the city full of idols. This morning we walked within the museum full of idol after idol. We saw figure after figure that represented different gods...from the god of protection to the god of destruction. It is so clear how embedded this is in the culture. While we were standing in front of these things, I got out my Bible and re-read my morning Scripture. Acts 17:23-31 "For while I was passing through and examining the objects of your worship, I also found an altar with this inscription, 'TO AN UNKNOWN GOD.'Therefore what you worship in ignorance, this I proclaim to you. The God who made the world and all things in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands; no is He served by human hands, as though He needed anything, since He himself gives to all people life and breath and all things; and He made from one man every nation...we ought not to think that the Divine Nature is like gold or silver or stone, an image formed by the art and thought of man. Therefore having overlooked the times of ignorance, God is now declaring to men that all people everywhere should repent..." This is what we are praying for the people of Cambodia, the people who God loves...that they recognize clearly the True and Living God, and they they repent.

We are falling in love with the people of Southeast Asia. Thank you for your prayers...we are still much in need of them.

The next step of our journey...

Our last hours in Thailand were quite eventful, yet peaceful. Monday night we went over to the home to have our last dinner with the girls and do one final lice check. It was fun to see them one last time, but much harder to say goodbye than expected.

I asked Laurie if it is hard for them to get attached with those that visit, only to have their new friends leave again. She told me that they have asked the girls this exact question. Their response was that they would rather have those relationships made, and shed some tears when then leave, then to never have experienced that love at all. This spoke to my heart and encouraged me greatly...that these girls, some who are orphans and lost so much already, can love that openly and without fear even though they have been broken so deeply. It challenged me to love that deeply and openly as well.

Before we left, Laurie asked us to go on a walk with her around their property. This was a beautiful time for us. We walked alongside the ponds and Barbara prayed that, just as God is the Living Water, that He would be the Living Water to these little girls and they would never thirst again. We walked along the places the future homes will be built and asked God to bring the right girls to these homes. We asked that they would be shown the love of Christ in that place. We asked for protection, safetly, peace, provision, and genuine love on that land. It has been so incredibly clear that God has gone before Remember Nhu each step of the way. And we prayed, anticipating that He would continue to do the same. After we prayed, we looked up and saw the mountains infront of us and Barbara quoted Psalm 121. "I will lift up my eyes to the mountains; From where shall my help come? My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth." This passage goes on to say "The Lord is your keeper...The Lord will protect you from evil; He will keep your soul. The Lord will guard your going out and coming in From this time forth and forever."

After a couple of more airports and planes rides, we arrived safely in Phnom Penh, Cambodia last night. We have not seen much of the city to this point, but what we have seen is quite shocking. All we have to do is open up our window binds of the hotel room to see land filled with garbage and hungry people without shoes.

We were able to meet Nhu for a brief time last night. She goes by a different name here in Cambodia, for security reasons. We cannot describe what a lovely and delightful young woman she truly is. Her smile is absolutley radiant! And it is so touching to see the bond that she has with Carl and Laurie, who truly have become her parents...she even calls them "Mom" and "Dad."

This afternoon we are off to the salon. Both Barbara and I have a deep love for Nhu already and anticpate learning more of this young ladies heart, who has already taugh us so much.

Please continue to pray for us. We are beginning to feel physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. And the culture shock here in Cambodia is definitely effecting us. We are thankful that we can claim Psalm 121 as truth...and we are claiming it today in order to accomplish what God has for us. We love all of you, back home, very much...

Just a quick update of today's events. :)

There is an absolutely wonderful couple, Titus and Neewa, who are house parents here at one of the homes. They have two little boys of their own and there are 21 girls who live at their property. After arriving here, we quickly saw that this couple didn't have a bed. So, being that it is our last day here in Thailand, Barbara spent the day shopping for a new mattress and beautiful bedding to surprise them with. It was so fun seeing their faces when they realized these things were for them! It was so great to see this couple, who sacrifices so much, feel blessed themselves.

While she was out shopping, this same couple took a couple of us up to visit one of the hill tribes, the Lahu people. For the last seven years, every Sunday Titus has gone up to preach and evangelize to these people who live in utter poverty. Three years ago, the first family in the village committed their lives to Christ. Today there are four families who are believers. Today I got the privilege to sit in one of their homes. I asked them what has changed the most for them since they came to know Jesus. The man's answer was "We no longer live in fear. We are not scared of evil spirits in the jungle." I was able to witness, on their faces, the freedom these people have experienced since Jesus broke them free from the bondage of fear. Also, to give you an idea of how poor these people are, I was able to purchase a couple of purses from them before I left that I could take home. I was told that the few purses was equivalent to about 2 months salary for them. If I had longer I would definitely want to go back to spend more time with them.

Tonight we are going to go have our last dinner in Thailand with all of the girls at their home. And I will do one last check for lice....this has been quite the ordeal! There will be a mixture of emotions when we leave, I am sure. Both Barbara and I will be eager to return, to love on them again. Tomorrow we leave for Cambodia where we will meet Nhu, and work at the salon with her. There may be limited internet access in Cambodia, but we will definitely try when we are able. But, for today, we are thankful to be with our new friends for the time that remains....